Fear is the absolute worst sensation I have known as a human. As a child, fear caused me to seek out my parents who could comfort and calm me down. As an adult the whole ‘mommy’ thing doesn’t work anymore….so then what?
The more you have, the more you can lose. I am not speaking of material things here…but family, friends, and even ‘your country’. Fear as an adult has a few affects:
- I hate everything that causes that sensation…if thats people, if thats a car crash (greatest fear for my wife), choking on a chicken nugget (I have a 14 month old)….I go extremely primal and want to rid myself of the ‘that’…I drive, I dice chicken nuggets so damn small it looks like rice when I am down with it, and I keep those people out of my life.
- We shutdown…basically live in a padded cell called your house, town, county, or country….I am not going anywhere, trying anything, going to public places that could draw out a looney toon, etc. “No way in hell is that going to happen to me!”
The below essay (visualized) helps bring me back to what is truly important. This essay, along with other straight gold, can be found in a collection of essays called Present Concerns by CS Lewis.
Buying a house is a big deal. Next to marriage, kids, and job it might be the next in line regarding big life events that determine the course of history for you and your family.
Buying a house exclaims many things, perhaps none more than: ‘Of all places I could live (in the US and even the world), I choose these coordinates! It is here where we will make memories, sow, reap, and dwell’. I could go on philosophically here…I won’t….rather, I want to share some practical things I am learning that can be broken down into a few categories.
- Young 30’s + Wife + 10 month old child (4 months old when we moved)
- I bought a townhouse when I was 25 (in 2006, worst time ever) in Alpharetta, GA. Lived with some dear friends for years to help me afford the place.
- I have been at my job almost 10 years and have enjoyed a consistent, lively career thus far
- I say the above because it comes into play on the finance side of things
- Zero debt outside of my home…no cars, college, or crud that I am stuck paying off.
- I am not in the 1%….meaning I am not making crazy money. Yes I make good money…so coming from that ‘opportunistic perspective’ is a privilege and I realize that.
Continue reading “What I have learned buying a house”
I recently broke out some of my old musings. While thumbing through these old journals and blogs, I had an extremely humbling thought – I was more intelligent back then. This is extremely discouraging. As a ‘rising professional’, I pride myself on: getting better at what I do, learning from my mistakes, gaining mastery over my domain, etc. I have always assumed this would mean that my intelligence, along with my ability to reason, would grow with my career or life advancement. However, this is very far from the truth. A case could even be made that as one narrows down on a trade/skill, they grow increasingly unaware of everything outside of that domain, thus they are “more dumb” in other areas of life.
Continue reading “Unplugging this Holiday + Stop Getting More Dumb”
When pulling into Starbucks this evening it hit me – I am a thief!
For years I have gotten to know many a barista as I have averaged about 1.65 coffee shops a day since college. With this has come ‘free coffee’. Free because thats how it was offered to me…but was it? Was it their coffee? Or…was it their shareholders coffee? Or their bosses coffee?
95% of the time it wasn’t theirs and I accepted it. I am a thief.
Continue reading “Are you a thief? I am. I stole a bunch of coffee.”
What would it be like to have coffee with Peter Thiel (the author + founder of Paypal), John Maynard Keynes, and ‘insert cliche philosopher name here’?
That’s what this book feels like, and it’s a beautiful recipe for a delightful and thought-provoking read. It deviates from your normal book on entrepreneurship (thankfully) and challenges assumptions that many (Roy) take for granted.
Continue reading “Book Review: Zero To One”
I had a communications professor in college who discussed embracing nerves as a central aspect to every speech/presentation you give. She framed up the conversation by saying butterflies are good so long as they fly in formation. I haven’t forgotten this, as nerves play an interesting role in my life and every time I give a speech/presentation or make a pitch.
I have seen nerves get the best of me (where I totally flop) as well as give me the fuel to give an impassioned presentation around seemingly mundane topics. Either way, I have come to love the role nerves play in my daily life.
How does nervousness intersect your daily life? Do you still get nervous? Do you enjoy it? Hate it?
Some brief thoughts around nerves, business, and their role:
- Nervousness is good
- If I don’t have nerves around something it is an indictment against my attitude in the matter.
- The people that say they don’t get nervous before a speech/event/sales presentation/etc are either:
- Or, they don’t care about their audience/others. Care, in this case meaning do they understand the weight of ideas? Are they understanding that they are stewarding other’s time?
- Do you get nervous when you meet people of rank?
- If so, does that mean you value them more than other people? Not ideal.
- If not, does that mean you are self-righteous and don’t view them as important? Not ideal.
- What’s the balance here?
- When I look at others as being no greater & no less than myself is when I am at my best for their sake and mine.
- Are your nerves based on peoples perception of you? If so, this is likely the paralyzing kind of nerves because it’s completely out of your control.
- If your nerves are based on the being the absolute best steward of the moment at hand then this is likely the kind of nerves that will enhance your performance and experience of the event